Black is White
I hope you do not consider it presumptious of me to take up the suggestion of one of your number that I issue open letters such as this with some regularity. Said issue is of course dependent on the time allowed to me by my studies, which are in turn dictated by the demands of my social life.
Or should it be the other way round? In any case this particular missive is necessary to save what sanity I have left after discovering on page 29 of my Theory of Law handout that there is a difference between "ley natural" ("natural law" in English) and "derecho natural" ("natural law" in
English). The difference is desperately pedantic but it exists, and dealing with this has necessitated some chocolate fortification.
My adventures have of late been somewhat tamer than Hallowe'en's excitement, which is of slight disappointment. You will be pleased to know however that I have acquired a twin! The realisation of the existence of said sibling came in a conversation with Johnny Jackson, a boy from Northern Ireland
(hereafter Tommy 5, due to his physical resemblance to Tom Cruise*, vocal resemblance to Tom from Big Brother, and the fact that both of his real names can be suffixed with 5). He asked me if I had a twin, and added that he only asked because I gave the impression that I was indeed a twin.
lightly perturbed by the suggestion that I consistently appear to be only half of the fruit of my mother's womb, I insisted on further discussion thereof. Imagine my delight on discovering that I do indeed have a twin! He is two months older than me (please get swept away in the excitement of it
all to a sufficient extent that the obvious logistical problems be forgotten), and his name is Caleb. He is in many ways my antithesis.
Another interesting recent occurrence is a message left on our answering machine by an old woman. The message lasts 1 minute and 43 seconds and concerns a tape, which was given to someone's nephew sometime in 1985. Said tape is capable of conferring "The Power" onto anyone who listens to it; the
details of "The Power" were never discussed, but I think that is probably for the best. It appears that the tape has now fallen into the wrong hands, and the group represented by this old woman are going to considerable lengths to reobtain it. Apparently the last known address for the nephew who
started all the fuss is the flat in which I am living, to which end she is anxious to talk to us about any details we could share of his location. We are awaiting developments of this story anxiously. Furthermore, the three of us who currently live in this flat have all lost at least one tape
since we arrived here. Coincidence? I thinketh nay.
What else? I almost instigated an international incident, by attending a dinner with 5 Italians and merrily deciding to begin a conversation about World War II. Oops... this compares to my biggest linguistic failure so far, which took place in the Corte Ingles (incidentally the BEST shop ever in
the history of the world, it sells absolutely everything, from cars to food to computers to clothes). I was attempting to buy something which would soothe mosquito bites, and simultaneously something I could plug in which would kill said beasties. Unfortunately my attempt at translation of this
ended up "Can you please give me something which will protect me from the pick-axes of the Moslems, and also something electrical which will allow me to destroy mosques?" Happily the staff of said establishment seemed quite used to dealing with the medical demands of poorly spoken foreigners, and
figured out what I actually wanted without having me arrested.
In other news, you will doubtless be intrigued to learn that I am currently the only Erasmus student in Valencia who arrived here single and is yet to fall for the charms of one of the natives or, more likely, a fellow Erasmus student. I myself was rather intrigued by this fact until I realised
that such liaisons occur all the time and would therefore be rather run-of-the-mill. As some of you know and the rest of you will learn, I am rather incapable of establishing intimate contact with another unless it takes place in circumstances of extreme scandal and, more often than not, dubious
legality. I am therefore quite content to await whatever outrageous escapade awaits me. It's only just out of reach, down the block, on the beach...
* the resemblance is only particularly notable in profile
Go to the first 'adventure'
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