The Cecilian Society

-You have pulled more Cecilians in 1 weekend than you have after almost 3 years in the society.
-You were there for the absolute failure that was cooking the rice on Saturday night.
-You saw Niall's rage at not understanding Umbridge.
-You know that the Cecilians have the ability to summon Scots comedians and have them appear before us.
-You loved the little cat but suspected that it was wholly unimpressed with us all weekend.
-Only Niall Murray knows how to make Harry Potter filthy.
-You know now that all Cecilians can quote Mean Girls word for word.
-Where's Desmond?!?!?!
-You resisted Veebs and her pen.
-You saw Dobie being bullied by a group of wannabe tattoo artists.
-You know that when Cecilians are asked to perform a wedding, they will always make it a civil partnership.
-You realise that you've never actually seen Kenny and Katie Price in the same room.
-You've convinced yourself that you've never actually seen Dobie and Alex in the same room.
-You know that one panto would have been WAAAAAAYYY awkward if the subject didn't have such a good sense of humour.

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Boo, you whore!

- You know that the best part of the window dancing was Dobie wandering through the middle.
- You were in hysterics at the purple man joke and can't convey to people why.
- You never had so much fun cleaning up after a meal.
- You know that Peter does really good massages.
- The best pantos are Cecilian.
- You would like to clarify to everyone that you have NEVER had sex with a shower and that only 3 people saw my guess at how it would be done.
- You and JG gave Desmond a make-over.
- You saw Desmond wet Paul's leg - twice!!
- You dug so many holes during 'I have never' that you were surprised to make it out of there.
- You know that tequila shots are horrible and are very grateful to Ronan for letting you suck his lime (not a euphenism!! )

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Energy.....

- You really felt for Lindsay and her totally unacceptable "JAMBO!" outburst.
- Your hangover induced numb-mouth resulted in spitting in Daly's face.
- You watched Chucklevision.
- You witnessed Gemma Murdoch posing in a door frame, complete with toilet roll hair accessory.
- You have never ever EVER seen someone react THAT badly to tequila.
- You cried yourself to sleep after Niall Murray performed, what can only fairly be described as, a "69er" on Desmond.
- You found yourself confused as to whether Desmond was male or female.
- You felt the sexual tension in the room.
- You know Paul Slevin is the king of dead-pan.
- Kirsty Leith steals all of Ronan's lines.
- You've eaten so many kettle chips and party rings you feel obliged to reimburse those who bought them.
- You know miracles in the form of "Pub Lunch Delivery" can happen.

you think that after successfully resuscitating Heather that you should be cast in a remake of Baywatch (plus my dad actually invented it)
if you can dodge an authoritarian state, you can dodge a ball
Micronesia and their people are just EGGcellant
you know that JG snores like a wilder beast and roars like a bear when he comes
you realised that Colin Dobie and Alex Robertson are the same person
you discovered that the vast majority of Cecilians have no coordnation
by the time you left, racism seemed perfectly acceptable, mainly thanks to Ronan Radin
your legs are as covered in mud after being speared by Sam- dick
you are know extremely confident that you are nearing or have surpassed Dalys number of cecilian pulls
you taught everybody what the "angry goat" entails
you wake up with digestive biscuits in your hair
you hate lucy wilde and bianchis chants of "FAIL" due to you not being able to grasp the elitist game that is Umbridge
you loved how mocking AIDS was a common occurrence
you love playing mock the week
TURN AROUND
HA, HA HA, HAHAHA, HAHAHAHA, HAHAHAHAHA, HAHAHAHAHAHA- AIDS AIDS
you now know Jesus has a fucking walloper
spin the bottle got totally out of control
she doesn't even go here
you have cuts from the wedgie delivered by Ronan and Sam
you learn to roll
you realise the best hangover cure is a joint
you witnessed the epic RICE FAIL
you know that so many fucking people snore
you loved the blurring of Robs Geordie accent with Jamaican and welsh
you realise there are defintely more than 25 reasons why you will never be with Cat Tyre,
you also realise at the top of that list is the fact you are in love with her big sister
you slapped people in the face with a "used" condom
you learned how to say I love you in Slovakian "LEE BOOM TAAA"
you realised JGs Stephen Gately impression is more like Paddy Lyons

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"I don't have a small penis, she has a big vagina."

- You were pretty sure on Friday that you had a really sore throat and may be coming down with the flu but decided not to tell people as you wanted to see if by the end everyone had a sore throat due to the epic orgy that was in face spin the bottle.

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You Go Glen Co-Co!

-you are sure that Niall HAS NOT learned how to say I love you in Slovakian
-you have sore throat...THANKS RONAN!!!!!
-Heather thinks you are the most likely person to do porn

-you've seen Niall shout at the cat of the Urr lodge to sing 'Memory' from Andrew Lloyd Webber's 'Cats'
-you've then seen Niall proceed to sing 'Memory' with 'MIAOW' instead of the original lyrics.

- You had to force Ben Galloway to eat due to his drunken nature
- Team Move(!)'s stealthy exit was only succesful due to a cider sacrifice from Gemma to save us all
- You know the correct way to put cheese ON TOP of pasta
- You were involved in the production line splashback
- You were shown evidence of a certain individual filling their quota for the evening
- Michelle Balogh can make a wedding accesory out of ANYTHING
- YOU WILL NEVER FORGET THE IMAGE
- You went on the hunt for Paul
- You know how many bridges there are on the way back from the weekend away...just in case *that's* where he jumped off
- You were raped by the bathtime crew
- The woman at the Urr Lodge is the BEST THING EVER
- You were offended by the poor attempts of Geordie accents
- You're involved in blowbacks

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Damn, I aint tryin' to sucker noone mofo.

- You sold a certain someone rope.
- You know what the web is and almost boked when Ben Galloway had chips and cheese at bowling!
- After bathtime you woke up everyone in your room because you were so cold and too drunk to find your towel
- If you had a phobia of snoring you most definitely would not want to sleep in the Thistle Room
- You got a bit too involved in rounders and got annoyed that there was a lack of unity between the fielders.
- You know that when Fieldy was fielding she put the field in Fieldhouse!
- When portraying Esther McMillan in anyway you have to black-up.
- You found it amazing that people hadn't refused to clean up the mess that you and Lucy created in the main livingroom.
- Laura Bauld can come prepared for anything as long as she can have some sort of bag/suitcase.
- Laura Bauld does humping.
- Unlike Selkirk there was no camel toe!!
- Tequila isn't half as bad when you see Wezza's boke face.
- You are beginning to think that the Paul Chalmers story was all a joke...
- Putting Fame on was the best idea ever!
- You didn't realise you could roll your eyes back into your head, cross them, keep them open and still be staring at someone whilst taking a drink...all at the same time.
- Someone definitely made a mess off their trousers...

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You Go Glen Co-Co!

- the sombrero hill
- DAZZLEDUST!
- Team FAIL.
- "If you were animals, he'd be a polar bear and you'd be a chimp."
- Chimp faces
- "For fuck sake, Peter!" - Kenny "Katie Price" Stewart
- you didn't find Bianchi's socks
- it's DILUTING JUICE!
- you scrubbed your arm red raw trying to get "I heart poo" off it
- you saw way too much flesh. From everyone.
- You ditched Fieldy for Ben because it was convenient
- You gave massages in exchange for Baileys
- You used massages as a bribery tool
- you think it's probably just best not to ask...
- you accompanied Jen Halliday to the room because she was scared of interrupting the "Cole Porter Discussion"
- you know Hannah and Daz love a bit of Cole Porter
- you witnessed Paul's absolute joy when he figured out Umbridge
- you witnessed Dobie's absolute distress to discover that they were playing Umbridge in both rooms
- you did a critical analysis of Postman Pat on Saturday morning
- "Welcome to GANDHI! Lodge"
- you know that Rob is in fact a 70-year-old woman
- Kirsty Leith wouldn't stop touching your PJs
- you did various elevator sketches through the window in the kitchen, your favourite being when the lift "broke" and everyone suddenly disappeared from sight
- you still don't really understand why Cecilian boys are so determined to wear the girls' clothes. Or in fact no clothes at all.
- "Christ, not again!" "We're not pulling, it's a blowback! Geez..."
- Esther and Ben nearly missing the coach home

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No, really.